The Big Lock Down, guest post

Nicole Yontz is a stay at home mom in Arizona, a parenting contributor to and a blogger for her own personal site at

Everyday we wade through this thing we call parenting, making judgment calls left and right with the singular goal of doing what is best and safest for our children and families. However, what may be good for one family is not necessarily for another and believe it or not, that’s okay.

Recently we said good-bye to sleeping in the baby crib and switched our three-year-old daughter to the big girl bed. The first few days went splendidly until something snapped in my toddler and she realized, “Hey, I can blow this popsicle stand whenever I want,” and oh boy did she.

One morning my husband and I awoke to our daughter covered in stickers that can only be found on top of the counter next to our stove. Not content with just pillaging our mail and possibly flambéing herself she also managed to take apart several pens and threw our expensive Cannon Rebel camera to the floor.

Later that day while I was on the phone because I thought she was napping, she snuck out of her room several times and into ours, ransacking our closets, cabinets and getting a hold of my husbands razor. Between each outing it was yelling, crying, and dragging back to her bedroom with a threat to stay in bed or else!

It didn’t work, none of it did and something needed to be done to keep my daughter safe in our home. After a lot of thought, Internet research and conversation with my husband, I opted to put a lock on my daughters door.

I have read a lot regarding this type of parenting, as well as spoken to many friends in my play groups and women’s groups, and the census is almost always split down the middle between the dos and the do not’s.

I do and this is why:

1. When my daughter was a baby I ensured her crib to be a safe place for her. Her bedroom is now an extension of her crib because I have taken every safety precaution necessary including video monitors, covering sockets and tacking cords to walls, etc.

2. There is hardly a moment that goes by during the day when I don’t have my eyes on my daughter so why would I let her roam around unsupervised at night?

3. I have been told to try baby gates, turning the doorknob around or even get the childproof doorknob covers for her door in lieu of the door lock but isn’t that essentially the same thing?

4. As much as I wish my toddler would listen to every last word I say and mind 100% of the time we all know that’s not how kids work, I can tell her to stay in bed all day, and she might sometimes, but she also might not. I am not in the practice of trusting a three year old with their own safety.

Please believe me when I say I have heard every argument and have taken them to heart. I really have. I understand when people say, “What if there is a fire?!” Yes, what if there is? How is me having to get her out of her room any different than me having to get her out of her crib? Keep in mind that my daughter is not being harmed or neglected; she is being secured in the safest place possible when I am not able to keep a watchful eye on her. I am the mom; my job is to protect my child from herself and this is how I choose to do it. If this is not how you choose to do it then that’s okay too. We’re all just trying to do what’s best for our own families and as long as that’s the end goal who is anyone to judge?

However, when she gets to high school we will probably be taking locks off, but that’s a whole other blog post….

Which side of the fence are you on regarding the door lock debate?


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